Is pregnancy a realistic prospect or should I let go?

[lag713]

Is pregnancy a realistic prospect or should I let go?

I have been ruminating a lot about the prospect of having children biologically. I am open to adopting children but I like the idea of having one child biologically if it does not threaten my health. The research seems to conclude that women with GPA have better outcomes if they have a sustained remission for 6 months or more prior to conception. Many women have a flare during pregnancy or shortly after giving birth. When making decisions about treating a flare during pregnancy the health and wellbeing of the mother as well as the child must be weighed carefully as many treatments are potentially damaging to the fetus but GPA is also life-threatening. There have been many instances of negative outcomes such as premature delivery, therapeutic abortions, and maternal death. The research is almost entirely based on case studies given the rarity of the disease and late onset. I'm afraid of what might happen if I try to have a baby but I can't shake a desire to have a biological child and experience that part of life.

I'm a newly diagnosed Weggie, 26 years old, in fairly good health. My first symptom was joint pain in July 2013, I went on methotrexate in September 2013, and was officially diagnosed in January 2014. My CT scan of my lungs was negative. I never had a biopsy of nose although that is the only place where the disease appears to be active (lungs and kidneys appear to okay for now). I've struggled with joint pain and swelling, fatigue, malaise, headaches, difficulty concentrating, eye pain and tearing, and sinusitis. I think that I am fortunate to be as healthy as I am. I am not in a rush to have children until I get GPA into remission, finish graduate school (I will get my PhD eventually), and secure a good job. I find myself researching 'vasculitis and pregnancy' or 'wegener's and pregnancy' or 'GPA and pregnancy' because I want to know if I need to make peace with the idea of not being able to have a child biologically. (I'm also an incessant planner so the 'see what tomorrow brings' take to life that GPA forces on me is a challenge.)

I have a supportive and caring partner who would like to have a biological child as well (and is also open to adoption) but wants my health and well-being to come first (I know how to pick 'em). Is it almost a certainty that my life expectancy is shortened? Is disability a likely future? Can I age in a healthy way and retain my functioning and independence? (I do research on occupational health, chronic illness, and workability so these issues are not unfamiliar to me. I also need to take better care of myself - get more exercise, eat healthier, sleep more, drink more water, and stress less.)

Is this too risky for me? Is this too risky for my child? Is this just hormones that are crying out that my clock is ticking or do I just want what I perceive that I can't (or may likely not) have?

I've always wanted to adopt one child. I fell in love with the idea after watching Wednesday's Child growing up. I think my ideal has always been to adopt one and have one. I worked with children with autism for a few years during and after college so I know what I would be getting into by having children and then some.

Is there another young female out there? How are you handling family planning?