Nikki, I can't see how things are going to get better without some sort of medical help.....NOW
I think it has gone to far.
You are no less important, or, in no less of medical need than another person is.
Look at poor Phil, he is in so much trouble at the moment and thankfully he went to the hospital and he was admitted and is now getting help.
The time has come for you to go to the hospital too (if it is closer than your doctors), and let them get you a little better (or a lot) before Christmas comes.
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