Your Thoughts on Dying.

[MCC]

I don't follow an organised religion, but I am still fairly comfortable about dying. If there is nothing to follow after death, then what's the problem? You'll know nothing about it anyway. If you are wrong and there is a whole new existence, then it will be an adventure.

My main concern is for my family and how they will cope, but everyone does somehow and at least they will be reasonably well provided for.

Yep I agree with you, that's why I was suprised at my reaction. Perhaps it was more a fear of not living anymore, it was kind of a highly charged with emotion time!

Now when I think about it doesn't hold the same fear.

[Jack]

I think it gets more scary the closer you get! It is easy to rationalise when you are feeling well and it is just a point of speculation, but when the reality comes knocking on the door it is much more difficult. During recent episodes of feeling unwell, I have had odd feelings wash over me and thought "OK what happens next? Is this it?" Perhaps it is just practice and will make the real event easier when the time comes.

[Kathie28]

This is a very interesting subject. I think my fear of dying is mostly related to leaving my loved ones behind. I don't want to miss a moment of my son growing up. I worry about that everytime this disease hits me hard. I am a Christian as well so I believe in heaven. A very good book I just started reading called
'Heaven is for Real" is a good read for anyone who does believe or is curious. It is the true story of a 4 year old told to his parents and his experiences when he had an emergency surgical procedure.
Of course I do hope like most to just dye in my sleep when that time comes. I would not want to be kept on life support for a long time when there was no hope.

[drz]

Yep I agree with you, that's why I was suprised at my reaction. Perhaps it was more a fear of not living anymore, it was kind of a highly charged with emotion time!

Now when I think about it doesn't hold the same fear.

Last year when I was certain that I wouldn't make it to morning I called my daughter over to apologize for leaving her and everyone. I felt sadness about leaving them and sorry they would be sad about my leaving. Then I just said good by and let go. No white lights, or people waiting in the light, no pain, no fear, just a sense of relief that the struggle for air would be over and drifted to sleep. But they weren't willing to let me go yet and she ran for nurse who came and cranked up the breathing machine to a high setting and I woke up in the morning feeling much better and a bit surprised I was still alive.

It was my third near death experience and the others felt much the same except no chance to say good by. To me i suspect dying will be much like having anesthesia before surgery or my intubation experience or falling asleep except you will wake up dead and no one knows what that will be like.

It seems to me from watching people dying from a chronic illnesses that death is generally a peaceful experience and welcomed relief from the the pain and suffering unless they have a lot of unfinished business they need to work through first.

I think a program like Hospice is a great aid in helping one live well through their last days and plan to use their services if possible. Of course if death comes quickly and unexpected with no advance warning that won't happen.

Like Yogi Berra said, "It is difficult to predict things, especially the future".

[watersedge]

Would it be easier to die if you had your family around you and somebody to hold your hand or would it be harder to let go knowing that they are upset and you are leaving them?

[Sangye]

It probably depends on your family. Some would be very easy to say goodbye to! (Trying to inject a little humor here.)

[pberggren1]

So true Sangye. Thanks for the humour.

[watersedge]

Gosh, sorry for the post folks, I suppose it was a bit depressing but living through the aftermath of wegeners at it most destructive is not a very humourous place to be and a lot of thoughts you have tend to be on the sader side of life. I do realise now that grief is a personal journey. I am sorry for all the doom and gloom posts, they are probably not to everyone's liking.

[jkthomas56]

Interesting topic but one i have thought about a ;lot, especially when I did not know what was wrong with me. I, like many others in this post, came to grips with a lot of things in my life that had been plaguing me. Being able to off load that baggage and realize how important family and friends are and just living every day to its fullest are now my drivers. When my time comes I am ready. I have never been particularly religious, but I have what I would call faith that there is something on the other side and I am not afraid of it.

We have all been dealt a terrible disease to deal with, but in many ways it was a positive in my life. At least now I can enjoy my time here better than I was before. Remember, it is the darkest before the dawn, and it is what you make of it. I wish everyone fighting this disease a beneficial outcome and hope the suffering is kept to a minimum. You are all good and caring people and at least deserve that.

Take care all, and fight this affliction every day with all your will.

[Sangye]

Gosh, sorry for the post folks, I suppose it was a bit depressing but living through the aftermath of wegeners at it most destructive is not a very humourous place to be and a lot of thoughts you have tend to be on the sader side of life. I do realise now that grief is a personal journey. I am sorry for all the doom and gloom posts, they are probably not to everyone's liking.

Your posts aren't doom and gloom, watersedge! ALL voices and experiences are welcome here. My mother and sister left me within 3 months of being dx'ed and never looked back, so that's what I was thinking about when I made my comment. I didn't think about how it might come across the way it did. In general I try to find humor in everything. It's a coping mechanism. I'm sorry if I inadvertently caused you pain.