Appreciating what I have

[windchime]

In the not to far distant past (months.) I thought for sure I was getting ready to check out. That may or may not have come through in some of my more anxious posts. My father lived a long life and my mother is still alive. I went through a very trying time thinking that life wasn't fair and that I thought I had 20+ more years left. I'm not the usual type that sits around and thinks why me, which made this even tougher to deal with emotionally. I've been very lucky as there are many of this forum that were/are in much worse shape than I.

Well, looking back on that dark period I'm now in a better position to appreciate what I have and where I'm at. Having any chronic illness inherently changes a person and the way they think. In doing so of course, our normal way of life morphs into something else. Sometimes we go with the flow and other times we are carried along kicking and screaming until it dumps us out at our "new" normal.

For those new to the disease I've tried it both ways and it's easier to go with the flow. You will get to remission by following the docs orders and following your protocols. If you choose not to do that then you are going to be carried along kicking and screaming to be deposited somewhere that you don't necessarily want to be.

I'm sure I had a purpose when I started this thread, but it's kind of turned into a little bit of a ramble. I just want to say that I appreciate where I'm at right now in my life as I know there is a lesson to be learned here. When I learn it I will move on to the next lesson. Sometimes I can figure out what the lesson is and other times not. Whether you figure it out what your lesson is isn't important, it's the process that we are going through that is important. You are here right now this minute because this is where you need to be to best accomplish what needs to be done. We chose to be here so make the best of it while you have the opportunity.

[Dirty Don]

Winds waft thru the windchimes
I want to see thru the unseen
Taste the breeze set upon us
Hear the melodies of me...
Winds hear thru the windchimes.

[Lilly]

Oh Cindy, what a beautiful, uplifting and so true post! You sound so good, and are an inspiration......Thank you so much, You are truly a beautiful Lady. Inside and Out. :-)

[Pete]

Cindy, I can only add an amen to your post. I too am fortunate. I am finally willing to admit to myself and to tell others that I feel great!

[Alysia]

thank you Cindy, for your inspiration and wisdom. we are blessed to have you here with us
after all, we are in God's hands and his ways are unknow to us.
Don, I love your poem

[mishb]

You have come a long way Cindy and this post shows that things are starting to look towards a better future.
I'm so glad that you are here
This is also where I need to be

[windchime]

Thanks all. I had a need to get that out last night. Maybe there was something in there that someone needed to see. God works in mysterious ways after all.

I do feel better and some of that is because the financials are looking better. It's so depressing wondering if all this paperwork you are completing is worth it. With that being said I'm very happy to be where I am at this particular time in my life. It could be much, much worse. Live life to the fullest everyone. There is no other way to do it!!

Pete, thanks for the poem. Loved it.

[annekat]

Great ramble, Cindy. Something we can all benefit from. I'm so glad you got your disability and have that ahead to help you deal with each day with less stress and anxiety. And Happy Birthday, too, though I think maybe it was yesterday!

[windchime]

Great ramble, Cindy. Something we can all benefit from. I'm so glad you got your disability and have that ahead to help you deal with each day with less stress and anxiety. And Happy Birthday, too, though I think maybe it was yesterday!

Thank you for the birthday wish. Maybe it was being a year older that got the ramble going. I dont know. Lol

[Alysia]

and you have a new signature