A public apology

[marta]

I just wanted to take this moment to apologize for being a knob.

I let history and my emotions get the best of me and said things that were completely unacceptable on a public page or anywhere else for that matter. I am ashamed and embarrassed of my actions, and there is absolutely no excuse for my behaviour. You are all wonderful people and none of you, not one, deserve to see, read, hear the words that I was spewing. There is history that many (most) of you don't know about, and little things that seem completely innocuous to a bystander got me going, but that is not an excuse or a reason to behave the way I did. In my own defense I did say I am not looking for a fight, but I let myself get pulled into one.

I am sorry!

I asked Andrew to remove me from the forum and he hasn't yet. Thanks Andrew. If he doesn't I will take a leave of absence from here and focus on what I can do to get us closer to a cure. I want to focus my energy on trying to affect positive change rather than what happened here this week. I have to tell you that on that day, I felt the worst I have felt in years. Years! I spent the whole day in tears and feeling such great loss that my body hurt all over. It's gotten better over the last couple of days, but I still am crying when I think about it or as I write right now. I'm not a cold calloused female dog like I came across on here. I promise. Ask any of my friends.

This place use to be my place of safety, comfort and answers on how to stay alive in a somewhat unbearable situation, Wegener's. I am sorry I took that feeling away from you but I'm also sorry that feeling got ripped from me. I have promised myself to keep an eye on the target and on the positive and avoid the negative and I failed this week. I hope you forgive me and let me back one day. In the mean time, I'll go out there and try to do us right.

Thanks to you all for being there for me and each other in our crazy life moments.

Marta

[Alysia]

Dear Marta,
you touched my heart with your words. in hebrew we would call you now: "bigger then life".
everyone here has his moods, because of the tough times we are going through with our bloody disease, because of who we are, because of life....
each one express it in his own way. the most important thing is that we all respect each other, no matter what. that we care for each other and that we are all fighting together this wg-dog....
I am relieved that you are coming here again with a peace gesture. thank you !
I am sending to you my best wishes for full recovery and better days.

[renidrag]

Not too long a vacation I hope. All your videos were great, bet you had a grand time. Now go skiing.
Dale

[pberggren1]

Apology accepted. I certainly forgive you Marta. One person will not see eye to with another on every topic. That's just the way it is. I'm sorry you let this eat a way at you. I have always liked you and always will like you. So please stay on the Forum and let the past be.

[Alysia]

thanks Phil. thanks again, Marta. it means a lot to us to have peace here. time for group hug....

[mishb]

I, personally, didn't even feel that there was a need for an apology.

As I said before, we all love you Marta. With so many people on here, not everyone is going to see eye to eye at all times - it's only human.

Andrew, please don't delete Marta........she is an integral part of this Group and we already miss her when she stays away so long

[Debbie C]

I guess I missed it...I hope it wasn't something I said ??? But Marta,you can not leave the group, I don't even know what a knob is ( it must be a Canadian thing !! ) but we all love you here and we all have our moments and then it's past.Take time out if you need to get yourself better and do what you need but you bring so much knowledge and laughter here that it would be a shame if you left us totally

[pwc51]

Hi Marta - aberations happen (I missed it too) - as a strength to so many on this forum I certainly hope your 'vacation' is short, of the order of nano-seconds!

[annekat]

Marta, I also am thrilled that you will not be leaving the group, and don't feel that an apology was really needed from you, although it is appreciated. I personally don't feel there is anything to "forgive" you for. It is true, as you have said before, that words can so easily lead us astray and cause misunderstandings, because they can so easily be ambiguous and misinterpreted. Also, none of us is perfect enough to always choose the right word for a given thought or situation. That is a part of being human, and every day we must overlook small inconsistencies and slightly misleading shades of meaning in each other's written and spoken words.

There is nothing wrong with taking a break for as long as you feel you need, as long as you are back at some point! With love,

[Michael Bell]

Hi Marta, all here forgive you and it is time for you to forgive yourself. Life with Wegs is hard on all of us and those who love us. You are loved here and always will be. Come back to us soon.
Mike