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Thread: Alive Day

  1. #41
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    Default Alive Day

    I have been avoiding this post because I think it is a great idea - but to me it is a signal of a mental shift from being negative about all this to having a positive outlook about it. I know which is the better option, I just cannot force my mind to feel good about it all yet. I sure don't want to seem fake and claim all's well when I feel otherwise.
    But some day ( when I'm done with my pity party) I'll claim December 22, 2012 as my alive day.
    I had achieved remission since my dx in 2010, but went to the er with shortness of breath. Come to find out I was I renal failure and nearly dead. I spent that Christmas and new years in the hospital plus some for good measure. I am still fighting to find a balance if drugs that will maintain my current remission.
    A lot to be thankful for? You bet. A lot to worry about? Maybe not, but to date I cannot kick the bad attitude. God bless all if you that can do this - you are better men and women than I.


    Sent from my iPhone while driving on the freeway, eating salt, and drinking a 78oz soda.

  2. #42
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    greenjeap

    I think what you are saying makes sense to me. I try to maintain a good attitude, but inside I am so unsure that everything is going to be ok. I still don't feel like I have ever been in remission and sometimes get very resentful for that. It gives me hope when I here of people living more normal lives and travel to wonderful places. I am so thankful and happy to be alive, but I'm just waiting for a break thru of feeling good more days than not.
    Jana


    Do not fear anything, just do it afraid!
    It does not matter how slowly you go, as long as you do not stop!


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