I can't sleep. I'm scared and worrying, and I'm just having one of those nights..
I just want my life to go smooth for a while. I'm moving out in a few months, trying to find a job and have a lot of exams and stuff coming up. But I've been having a sore throat for a while now, a bit on and off really. And now these past days I've been starting to worry that my tracheal stenosis is becoming worse again. I just can't take any more of that right now. There's so much happening in my life and I want to be as healthy as I can be, as I've been this past two months, for it. And I don't know if I can cope if I get sick this fall, when I start studying in the university and I have to work as well.. And I don't want to tell my boyfriend about this until I'm certain I'm getting worse, I don't want him scared as I am.. And I'm scared to tell the docs as well, I don't want to go to the hospital again right now.. I might even be imagining getting worse.. It seems to good to be true that I'm doing this good. Its been two months since my dilation, and just one month since they said everything looked good. But I think I'm starting to cough more and more, and a little more out of breath than just a couple of weeks ago..
Sorry for this "hard to make sense out of"-post. I just had to rant a bit.. Thank you for being there.
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