Does any one else have days like this?

So today I have not been able to stop crying. Husband is at work and daughter is at school. I work from home. A couple weeks ago I lost my grandpa, and the year before I lost my grandma. I was close to both of them and then after I lost my grandfather I went to the hospital with covid. I don't know if it's because this is the 8th close call I've had in 12 yrs or if it's just finally all hitting me at once, but I manage to stop crying enough to blow my nose and then it's waterfalls all over again. I just want to know if I'm the only one who has days like this or if it's par for the course.

Hi Lily

You're grieving the loss of your grandparents. You're dealing with the aftereffects of a dangerous disease while dealing with another one that's chronic that probably caused a major change in your life style. That's a big load. I think (IMHO) that what you're experiencing is natural and healthy. At some point, if you continue feeling this way with the uncontrollable crying, you may want to speak with a grief counselor.

Sending you a virtual hug and hopes that tomorrow will be better.

Thank you Pete, I have managed to stop crying, thankfully. I do think you're right, think it is just everything hitting all at once because I gave myself time to grieve for my grandma last year but didn't give myself the time for my grandfather. I'm still not quite ok but I think with all the crying I did it got alot of what I have been holding in out. Another thing I think is getting to me is in the 12 yrs since I was diagnosed this last hospital stay with covid scared me the most. I've been careful and watching my O2 go down like that scared me. It's not like it hasn't happened before it's just I watched it decline still waited despite knowing I should have gone. I have a appointment with my rheumy in a couple days. Will definitely also talk to her

Hi Lily,
These are trying times. Having our disease during covid is wearing many of us down.
The loss of your grandfather brought back memories of your grandmother. It is normal to mourn. If you are religious, this is the time to give thanks that you were blessed with these wonderful people in your life into adulthood. You are also very fortunate to have a husband and a daughter. When you feel like crying think about the joy they bring you and what joy you need to bring into their lives.
If you have no control over the crying, then reach out for professional help before you sink deeper into depression. Deep depression causes stress which will only exacerbate your health conditions.

Masha

Hi Lilly,

It is OK to cry. Better let it out then holding inside. You have been through a lot and it is indeed very painful.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Sending you prayers.