Tribute to Al Swanson written for his funeral (sent to wife Eileen)

[KathyB]

Al – That’s the only name I knew. *His avatar in our Wegener’s Granulomatosis forum was a beautiful sunset … or maybe it was a sunrise. Full of color, full of depth, full of joy. *So perfectly Al.
*
I got to know Al last fall in our forum as a newly-diagnosed “Weggie” as we call ourselves. *I was frightened beyond belief and totally ignorant of the disease. *Then someone recommended I join the forum … and that’s where I “met” Al. *Each and every day I had a new question or needed clarification about something medical. *Since you all know Al, you know he patiently answered all my questions. *And everyone else’s questions as well. *He answered with so much authority and wisdom, I was sure he must have been a doctor. *Sure he had lots of information to share, but more important was HOW he shared. *Technical to a fault but with the words anyone could understand. *And then he filled his responses with humor and compassion. *This scared girl learned to trust and Al made me believe I was going to be okay regardless of the incurable status of the disease.
*
Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago when I learned I had been denied disability. *Not knowing what to do, of course I turned to Al by sending him a private message. *If anyone could help me with a fresh set of eyes, I was sure it would be Al. *He promptly wrote me back and asked me to send him as much documentation as possible to explain their decision. *Within one day he responded with a thoughtful letter and suggestions on how to fight back. *That was Saturday night. *Al fell ill on Sunday. *He helped others through this disease until the very end.
*
Needless to say, the Weggies were stunned by Al’s passing. * I still read forum questions and look for Al’s answer. *Many posted their thoughts about Al.
• I outed him as a teddy bear , not a grouch
• He would have given anything to any one of us to make our journey more bearable
• He brought comfort to many members and helped educate others
• He gave plenty of everyday sensible advice to many of us, backed by his knowledge, and dispensed in plain English, with humor whenever it was fitting.
• People ask me, how can you have such a friendship with these people that you haven't met and live over the other side of the world from.......but you know what, it is true, I don't have a friendship with these people.......these people are family.
• His writing style kept me reading almost every one of his posts.
• I think we all counted on Al to give us a more scientific slant on many of our common issues and to help us keep abreast of latest research findings.
• Al was there with suggestions of what to do, what not to do, what to ask the doctors and what to expect. He was here almost every day for all of us with suggestions and interpretations of what some test results meant and didn't mean, and how to follow up with our doctors.
• This forum has lost one of its big contributors; I will miss him to no end.
• Al is a person I strive to emulate. He is loving, caring, exceptionally generous with his time, knowledge and compassion. I feel so much richer having gotten to know him in the last year, and feel like he's a very close friend despite never having met him in person.
• He seemed to be a very kind, giving man with a lot of knowledge which he shared with everybody along with sound advice and kind words. He gave a lot of his time to trying to help others and I always noticed how he replied to everybody which does really help to make people feel that they are being listened to and to help make them feel more welcome and included in the group which he did magnificently.
• Al was a very clear thinker, an accomplished essayist and one who was sincerely interested in everyone's well being.
• "To live in the hearts of those you loved is never to die."
*
It was clear to all of us – Al lived his life to the fullest. *He gave of himself freely and we are all better for having known him. *Thank you to the Swanson family for sharing Al with us. *One of Al’s last quotes on the forum said: *
“Courage does come hard, but think of how brave you must be just to live--and think of those you are living for. *Even more reason to take extra care of yourself. We love you."
*
Al – WE LOVE YOU! *Rest in peace, friend.

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Thanks to you all for your thoughts and words. In Eileen's email yesterday, she said the family had been able to access our forum and read all the comments! I hope they were able to understand how much we loved and appreciated Al. I want to take a moment to let you know how much I have enjoyed sharing my story with you. Each and every day brings about unique challenges for us all. Just knowing you are out there brings me a sense of peace. Thank you.

KB :hug1::hug1::hug1::hug1::hug1:

*

[drz]

Great job and nice quotes!

[Dirty Don]

Thank you Kathy for summing it all up...kind of helps the closure bit. It's a bit 'administrative' (ducks as pen flies by my head...smiles), but very complete...again, thank you!!

Don

[Pete]

Perfect!!

Pete

[KathyB]

Hey Dirty Don ... Eileen shared they were using your poem during the service today! Im sure she recognized the artistry of your words! It really was beautiful and not "administrative!". LOL!!

KB:wink1:

[annekat]

Great job of pulling that all together, Kathy! Thanks!

[Lightwarrior]

Well said and a very thoughtful conglomeration of our thoughts. I am happy to hear that they used Dirty Don's poem, I just know that AL would have loved the poem. Thank you Kathy for putting all of our thoughts together.

[Sangye]

I love what you wrote, Kathy and I love your poem, Don. How wonderful that both were read at the service.

[mama2005]

Great job to both you guys. He sure will be missed.

[maria garcia]

Oh no I just read this Al my buddy he was my calmer at all times. He would send me private messages calming my nervous during my daughters illness and a mother with no experience. What happen?

[KathyB]

He suddenly passed due to a massive blood infection ... they did everything possible to save him. I copied his wife Eileen's message a few weeks ago. It was such a shock. I'm sorry you are just learning about it. Eileen shared the great passion Al had for our WG group. I miss him every day...

KB

[drz]

He suddenly passed due to a massive blood infection ... they did everything possible to save him. I copied his wife Eileen's message a few weeks ago. It was such a shock. I'm sorry you are just learning about it. Eileen shared the great passion Al had for our WG group. I miss him every day...

KB

Any details on how he got it? He was always expressing lot of caution toward any illness saying things like "there is no such thing as just a cold when you have Wegener's"! He frequently reminded of us of the need to be vigilant about flares and infections and taking care of ourselves. Al and I had discussed our mutual fears of losing our kidneys to another flare or dying from an infection brought on by our broken immune systems. The loss of Al only amplifies my anxieties in this area and vividly reminds us all of the need to be vigilant and to try take the best care of ourselves that we can. His reminders and wisdom and knowledge and compassionate posts will be greatly missed. I am glad we all got to benefit from his time here.

[annekat]

Drz, Al had just recently returned from "bird camp", I believe the one associated with Cornell University, who hosted some of the birdcams we'd been watching. I don't remember how much time had passed since he returned when this infection hit. I have to wonder whether he picked something up at bird camp. On the other hand, it was so sudden and fast, maybe it had to be something else.

In any case, it is sobering, if he picked something up in the course of everyday life. I don't know how heavily immunosuppressed he was. I think he was on Imuran and about 9mg. of prednisone. I think he had ongoing kidney issues. But that is all I know. I, too continue to feel the loss of Al, his personality, wisdom, and compassion, on this forum, and I think we all will for a long time.

[Dirty Don]

Anne, Al had been home just over 2 weeks from bird camp...he was still catching up on WG notes and so on. But, in his PMs between us, he indicated he wasn't feeling well, was very tired, too tired to get things done - this was about a week after he had come home; he may have been feeling that way earlier. So, it is possible he caught something at the camp. Point is he told me he'd watch it carefully, and I agreed, I should have known better and so should he...as Weggies, we're all the same, so susceptible to the immediacy of illnesses other than our own. Not only must we watch ourselves constantly, we must react immediately...not as in hypochondria, but it has to be a near state of such with some reason employed...another reason we not only have to be educated about what we have, we must react with immediacy and knowledge of who we are now and what needs to be done...sighs...I will miss Al for a very long time I'm afraid, and I need to use that as a constant reminder that I, too, despite my nature to forget when I feel well, am at the edge constantly...and always will be...not a paranoia, just a reality...

[annekat]

I can't help but wonder if he picked up something really weird from the birds themselves, their droppings, whatever..... the imagination runs wild. Or something from another human to which he was more susceptible being from another part of the country. In any case, we are all human, and while being very attentive to the needs of others, as Al was, we often tend to let our own needs slide a little.... I doubt that he ever imagined something could hit that fast and hard. Like you say, he was feeling tired and unwell earlier, which I was aware of, too; I figured that would be normal for a Weggie after a trip across the country and back, and he may have figured the same. But as you imply, that could have been the beginning of what ultimately brought him down. Although I actually met Al, I know you had a closer relationship with him, Don, and I respect that and feel your loss.