Chicken pox

[gwenllian111]

I've just come out of hospital, again, after having suspected (now confirmed) chicken pox from my daughter. It's been such a nightmare, I'm so scared. I felt as if I wanted to die. I had lines in my feet, and they hurt so much. I don't know how much more I can take, especially with the arthritis too (which I'm wIting to start anti tnf for). I feel so scared, especially after what happened to jack and how all of you suffer so much. Sometimes I just want the suffering to end. Its my children and husband that keep me going, but even so, I feel as if I can't take anymore.

[Lightwarrior]

Do you have chicken pox or shingles? I am sorry for your suffering and I have also been at the point where I felt like I couldn't take it any more. I ride a scooter, which some of my colleagues laugh at and I am now taking Cymbalta 60mg for about 6 weeks and I feel better. I don't think I even realized I was depressed. Please don't suffer alone, get pain relief. Two percocet a day and the cymbalta have me feeling better than I have ever felt. I hate using pain control and that darned scooter, but being mobile (scooter) and lowering my pain from a 10 (on scale of 0= no pain and 10= extreme pain) to a 4 or 5 is making my life so much happier. I wonder if you need a pulse of steroids? I am sending you warmth, energy, love and light. oh and hugs

[delorisdoe]

I am so inexperienced in this I just dont know what to say. When does it end right? I think that Jack had good and bad times. I believe you will make it through all of this and you will have less pain someday. I think Lightwarrior is right though...I think something like cymbalta is in order. Something to take the edge off of the despair you feel. I think it is possible that if you dont do something to ease the mental pain that all of this physical pain you are in then you will be suffering needlessly. Pain is a viscious cycle. The pain messes with your mind and makes you depressed and the resulting depression leads to more pain.

[Al]

Gwenllian--

Chicken pox/shingles is nothing to sneeze at, despite the comical name. It is due to a nasty virus that lies dormant in the body pretty much forever; it comes out to play when the immune system is compromised, which means that most of us are potential playgrounds.

Nasty, brutish, and painful, to adults, in my experience (I had childhood chicken pox, but don't remember much about it.) A hot aloe bath I found to give temporary relief, but it was still a wasted few weeks, when I couldn't do much to earn my keep. It wasn't fatigue, exactly, but more of an inertial impediment. Once I got moving, I could keep moving; when I sat down, it was too easy to keep sitting. I think if I were a depressive sort, I think I would have been a basket case. I'm not; even so, there was a definite funk that was hard to break out of. (One thing that is pretty much a permanent fixture of my personality is to rant at things I consider stupid--in current events, politics, and so on. That I couldn't muster enough juice to care enough to rage was telling. Even more was the fact that this didn't worry me!) I do not know how to advise you specifically, as everyone is different. For me, immersing myself in writing and cooking and fetching coffee for my wife took the edge off--enough that I could become professionally (and even socially) productive again in less time than the medical pundits had given me.

Pain can be serious, both directly and indirectly. Please take care of this part of yourself! I'm not sure about a blast of prednosone, or prednisolone. True, in a big pulse, you might feel like a million bucks, for a short while. But you can't keep taking it at that level, and the virus can keep on offending for a long time.

And keep the reports coming! They can be good therapy as well.

Al

[Sangye]

Aww Gwen, I'm so sorry to hear you're not doing well. I understand the feeling of being so tired of suffering. What gets me through those times is forcing myself to remember that everything is impermanent. You might have pain every day and all of a sudden it's gone, or the pain control meds start to work. Or you're exhausted and then you get a bit of energy. Nothing can stay the same. I hang onto that truth whenever I feel overwhelmed by what is happening.

One day-- or hour, or minute, or moment-- at a time.

[elephant]

Gwen, I agree with the rest of them. You need something like an anit-depressant and this will help your overall state of mind and be able to do more mentally and physcially.

[vdub]

I've been on anti-depressants for about 3 years now. Good stuff! I have no reason to go off of it, so it will probably just be included with the rest of my pills for the rest of my life. The tramadol (codiene/tylenol mix) seems to have become a positive part of my life, too. I feel good physically and emotionally, so I'm not changing anything.

Shingles is bad news -- definitely something you don't want to mess with. If you get a chance and you aren't on any immuno-suppressants, then check with your doc and get a shingles vaccination. I had a break in my mtx about a year ago when I had knee surgery, so the first thing I did was get the shingles shot. I'm glad I did.....

[Psyborg]

Gwen I hope you feel better soon. I am also taking an anti-depressant. Though mine was in large part due to anger issues instead of depression. Anyway it definitely makes me easier to live with for the family.

[gwenllian111]

I've been on anti depressants for years, would never come off them now! Sorry, just having a very bad day I think. The fact that the doctors struggle so much with getting IV lines gets me down, so i'm really hoping to get a central line (semi perm) fitted soon. I'm having tracheal surgery in the next few weeks, so i'm going to discuss with my doctor about having one fitted while i'm under a general anaesthetic.

Anyway, the rash is starting to go and I think the anti viral medication must have worked. Thank you God.

Thank you everyone for your messages, they really keep me going.

[Sangye]

Hang in there, Gwen.